Lessons of Love and Lust…

Has the thought of cheating on your partner or your partner cheating on you ever crossed your mind? Well I won’t lie….. I’ve had that thought before subconsciously and consciously it did happen. Am not taking any credit for it that’s for sure, but sometimes shit happens and you learn from it.

I would say that my past relationships were formed more from the idea of lust rather than love. You know, sometimes it’s peer pressure, sometimes it’s “why not la…. he seems like a nice fella”, or even from a message that a lil’ cupid [your friends without the wings, bows & arrows] passed on or even because of him being very persistent. Well at least this kind of things only happens when you are in your teens or at least early twenties.

One of the many things that I’ve learned is that it ain’t a nice feeling when you find out that your other half is cheating on you or vice versa. Goodness…. When that happened to me, I stopped breathing. Felt like there was a brick stuck in my air hole. And the nights of endless crying and wondering WHY? Why? Why? will begin. Questions of “what does she have that I don’t?”, “why now?”, “what did I do”, “what was it I didn’t do?”….. and the list goes on, trust me on this. And I got to a stage where I went mental…. Like a real Looney walking and pacing around the house. Damn… don’t want to be in that situation again.

After a few weeks of recovering from the trauma, I began to realize that maybe subconsciously it was what I wanted but could never admit it in my conscious mind. Well like what they say “30% of the time our mind operates consciously and 70% of the time our mind operates subconsciously”. Whatever it was I thank god for it for many reasons.

If not for it, I would not be with the person I am with now.
If not for that, I would never have learned that “In order to love another you have got to love yourself first”.
If not for it, I would have never realized that “Always place yourself as first priority”
If not for that, I would have never believed in love itself.



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I’ve been through enough relationships to know that you can’t find love but love will find you.

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